There are a few signs that can be taken when a blog has not been updated for a few weeks. One, that I have died in a horrible accident and a monument depicting my many good acts is being erected in my hometown at this very moment. However, clearly, with the presence of these keystrokes, that one is out. The more obvious one is that life has somehow gotten too busy to find even the slightest moment to sit down and write what has been happening in my world as a student teacher. I wish I could go on to say that it has all been "good work", that my future career is all coming together, but it looks a bit more like this. PSII's slogan should really be something along the lines of "We break you down, so life won't have to". I wasn't surprised at how much work would be involved, it was more that I was surprised at how bad I was at doing all of the work. Man, I sucked. I would compare it to the moment when Superman first comes in contact with Kryptonite. He's walking around thinking he's all super-manly and such, and then BAM, green rock kicks his butt, and he don't know why. Of course, I'm not saying I'm Superman, I don't look nearly as good in tights, but just that overconfidence that gets decimated with the addition of something so simple. So I closed myself off from the world and tried to learn how to become a productive and planned member of the teaching society.
There have been some successes (I will have taught an entire fight choreography unit), and of course numerous failures (I said numerous so we'll wait for that list), but through it all there has been a support system to lean upon. The biggest being those who see the potential in me, and not letting me off the hook to achieve that potential. It's annoying, though, to not be able to just change my way of thinking and become better. Like, why is that so hard? I need to think a couple steps ahead, so let's think a couple steps ahead. However, knowing where I need to grow is something I can be proud of. I'm not ignorant to my weaknesses, I'm sad at having them, but they are obstacles I can overcome. And I will, it just won't be an immediate thing. Learn to walk before running and all that jazz. With only three more teaching days left I can look back and actually see growth. I have gotten better, and with experience I can keep getting better, I just might need to fight through a few tears (manly tears) in order to do so. And now it's time to sign off and get to that planning I was talking about. I look forward to giving the full rundown of my time in my second practicum, but that'll need to wait. I haven't thought of a catchy enough title yet.
There have been some successes (I will have taught an entire fight choreography unit), and of course numerous failures (I said numerous so we'll wait for that list), but through it all there has been a support system to lean upon. The biggest being those who see the potential in me, and not letting me off the hook to achieve that potential. It's annoying, though, to not be able to just change my way of thinking and become better. Like, why is that so hard? I need to think a couple steps ahead, so let's think a couple steps ahead. However, knowing where I need to grow is something I can be proud of. I'm not ignorant to my weaknesses, I'm sad at having them, but they are obstacles I can overcome. And I will, it just won't be an immediate thing. Learn to walk before running and all that jazz. With only three more teaching days left I can look back and actually see growth. I have gotten better, and with experience I can keep getting better, I just might need to fight through a few tears (manly tears) in order to do so. And now it's time to sign off and get to that planning I was talking about. I look forward to giving the full rundown of my time in my second practicum, but that'll need to wait. I haven't thought of a catchy enough title yet.